Shelby du Jour presents @alexandra

Attractive, but sincere, passionate, but wanting to fall in love, a surprising present and a future to write. This is the story of the new protagonist of Sex Stories - Shelby du Jour, who, at the fourth feature, this time meets Alexandra Blair, a young woman with a world inside, who lives overwhelmed by the frenzied New York but above all by her biggest love: the music.

Between a project called Silk War and Bukowski's great classics, this is Alexandra.

#1 What is The Silk War and how long have you been making music?

The Silk War is a music project I’ve been working on with James Mullen ever since I met him. We started writing immediately having been disillusioned with the current music atmosphere both in NYC and elsewhere. We wanted to write cinematic, intoxicatingly sad music that is forever honest. We decided on the name, The Silk War, first because we wanted to use the word “silk.” James and I have always been obsessed with Sylvia Plath, and through my reading of her collected poems and diaries, I had found that she used the word “silk” numerous times. We then wanted a word that was contradictory at first glance, so we thought of the word “war.” The Silk Wars were actual wars fought by the Roman Empire to gain access to the silk routes. These wars were said to be fought for the luxuries of women, which couldn't be more fucking perfect. Now, the luxuries of women refer less to fabric and more towards equality for both mind and body.
A war that is still being fought today. As for how long I’ve been making music, I’ve been singing and writing poetry forever. I just hadn’t really put them together seriously until I met James and started The Silk War.

#2 Your lyrics are beautiful - intimate with a gleam of underlying sadness. What are your writing process and movement behind the songs?

Thank you so much for saying that. For the most part, I love to write when I’m hungover. Not necessarily when I’m full of regret but more pained from the clarity of the next morning when I have to come to terms with life by myself without having the immediate option of drinking everything away. I also started only with writing about my childhood, nothing that had to do with love. Writing about love can end up being so cliche, especially right after a break up, so I always try to avoid it for as long as I can. I gain most of my inspiration from the orchestrations that James creates. I also gain a lot of inspiration from the books I read, mostly classics - everything from Nabokov, Simone de Beauvoir, and Jean Paul Sartre, to Bukowski, and, of course, Plath. I read and write every day, incessantly. Some days are better than others. I try not to sit down and tell myself I have to write the best lyric of my life. I mostly just keep writing until I stop. And I always have my notebook with me. Otherwise, I’d end up just forgetting most of my thoughts.

#3 How has your sexuality impacted your work and vice versa?

Immensely. Being a girl-woman living in NYC has taught me a lot about sexuality and how important an open mind is. I realize that the double standard pertaining to women and being openly sexual is unfortunately alive and well. I do fundamentally believe that women can be animalistic in their sex lives and still have the capability to fall in love, the same as men. There is immense power in female sexuality, and I’m obsessed with it. I love the violence of it, and I love writing about it.

#4 What is love to you?

Love is humiliating and sad. One of the few emotions we have yet to understand. I hate it at first glance because it tends to stunt creativity and normally paralyzes me (especially when I’m not around the person I’m in love with). But love pushes things forward and begs and makes fools of us all which I like. So I guess I have a love/hate relationship with love.

#5 How do you set healthy boundaries for yourself and the people around you?

That’s unfortunately something I haven’t quite figured out yet. Growing up as an only child, I tend to want to be the most important thing to everyone I even remotely like. The best possible advice I can give is to spend a lot of time alone and work creatively, constantly. You will then be able to accept other people for who they are without expecting the world. Or at least all of theirs.

#6 Your stage presence is very commanding and attention-grabbing. How do you harness that power? Do you see a difference in yourself on vs off-stage?

Thank you, I love performing. I honestly spend so much time harbored in all of my insecurities that when I’m on stage with material that speaks openly about insecurity and heartbreak, I feel powerful when I bring them to the surface when I relate to the audience through all my anxiety. There lies the massive difference between me onstage and offstage. I have so much more confidence to move and to feel and to not overthink. I don’t know how to do it in real life. It’s all still me though, just the person I’ve always wanted to be.

#7 Describe the dating scene in New York.

Non-existent. Dating in NYC is a thing of the past, at least in terms of what people think is “normal”. There’s no going to the movies, or slow and steady infatuation. It’s fast and toxic. I find that dating in New York, once you do it for long enough, pushes each one of us to find someone who understands us mentally. We grow very tired very quickly of wanting someone just because they’re hot.

#8 Where do you see yourself and The Silk War in 5 years?

I’m the kind of person who wants everything, so I guess everything? If I can change one person’s life and keep them from the edge because they know that someone else feels just as alone as they do, I’ve done my job. I also want a large platform to speak our message. I want to be politically involved. I want to have them turn the lights on the crowd at a festival like Thom Yorke and sing our songs with everyone around. So I guess, yeah, everything.