5 mistakes not to make when dressing up for Halloween

Men have a hard time with Halloween parties. More than a waste of money, for them it is a waste of time. «I want to drink, not dress up», is the most frequent statement made at these parties. It is a pity that in life the greatest sin one can commit against oneself is the lack of self-deprecation. Why perpetuate the stereotype of the uptight, serious, over-manly man who cannot stoop to certain frivolities? These people are true vibe-killers. After all, it is Halloween, isn't it? The only thing that differentiates it from the rest of the festivities are the disguises - to participate in a party you have to get into its spirit. Even worse: men who insist on not dressing up reduce life to such basic elements that they betray the utter barrenness of their character. Having imagination, nowadays, is not an optional extra. And a good disguise not only starts many conversations but is remembered for years to come. Nevertheless, there is nobility in not dressing up on principle and declaring it: this is an honourable and conscious attitude. But don't act like you're too cool for Halloween.

Here then are the 5 mistakes not to make when dressing up for Halloween.

1.The no-brainer Joker (and every other generic costume)

Let's start with the Joker. If your disguise includes green hair and a purple suit, you have all our respect: you have made the effort. If, on the other hand, you have decided to be the Joker but then paint your face with a smile by dressing up as you do every day, you denounce a lack of imagination of such a kind as to drive one to exasperation. Remember that episode of The Office where three different characters show up dressed as the Joker? The costume's lack of imagination was a gag back in 2008. The same goes for other generic costumes that include bleaching your face or decorating the corners of your mouth with lipstick to simulate blood but along with your everyday outfit. The great thing about Halloween is being able to indulge your pop interests. Dress up as a footballer, dress up as Donald Trump, dress up however you want but snatch a laugh or a shred of curiosity. Dress up as whatever character captures your interest - especially with cheap costumes that show inventiveness and wit. Remember, it's a Halloween costume if you can fully answer the question, "What are you dressed up as?" Demerit points if you only put on one eye make-up without dressing up as in A Clockwork Orange. There is nothing worse than a half-hearted provocateur.

2. Overly impractical costumes

There are many ways to celebrate Halloween: there are those who have a drink outdoors, those who go dancing, and those who have a party indoors. When making up your costume, you should think about the environmental context you will face on your evening. If you cover yourself in a faux fur costume, for example, expect to have to remove it if you go clubbing. If you dress up as a lifeguard from Baywatch or a ballet dancer to get in and out of clubs, expect pneumonia. You will be in a space full of people and your costume is as bulky as those of Disneyland figures, expect to spill a lot of drinks. If you wear a mask that covers your entire face, expect to have to remove it every thirty seconds to drink or smoke a cigarette. In short, you can amuse yourself or amuse others by seeing how hard you try to survive your costume - not everyone is Heidi Klum.

3. The thirst trap

There are two types of thirst trap on Halloween. The first is the junkie fuckboy who is handsome as sin, knows he is, and throws his chiselled physique in your face, perhaps combining it with random make-up (see point 1). This category disguises itself without dressing up: the purpose of the costume is to celebrate his narcissism. This year it will surely be Barbie's Ken, or some action hero, or simply any monster but almost shirtless. Obviously, the more toxic he is, the more naked he is: if you can see his nipples, he will break your heart without even realising it. The second category is that of the 'reformed'. You know that friend who has the physique and size of an MMA fighter but is such a good guy and mama's boy that he acts like Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory? To transgress on Halloween he will even show you his arms - maybe even wear a tank top. Livin' la vida loca? Not really.

4. The overdressed one

This person has been preparing an absurdly elaborate disguise for months: the entire armour of a Stormtrooper or Halo's Master Chief, the perfect replica of the Gryffindor uniform, any Johnny Depp character reproduced with the same meticulous care as in the couture ateliers, maybe even the 1:1 replica of one of the characters of the Saint Seiya or the Iron Man costume with real working LEDs costing several thousand euros. If the basics fall into overdressing, this category falls into the opposite, into overdressing, into not being able to read context. The former take themselves too seriously to be silly, the latter take something silly too seriously. There are cheaper ways to tell the world you can't read the room.

5. The obscure reference 

Ah, you have dressed up as Khan from the 1982 film Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. Great, now you have to explain the entire Star Trek mythology to everyone else. Are you Hester Prynne from The Scarlet Letter? Good luck finding someone with even a superficial knowledge of Nathaniel Hawthorne's novels. Or you are dressed as Bobba Fett, so you can spend the whole evening telling someone the story of the original Star Wars trilogy. The same goes for characters plucked from any other famous film or literary saga. And it is easier to say you dressed up as a hunter on safari than Ernest Hemingway, just as it is much better to say you dressed up as a generic 'man in tails' than as the Penguin from Batman. Like a good joke, a costume is not funny if it needs explanation and disclaimer.